Monday, November 02, 2009

They Know How to Make Me Smile (even if it's a lopsided smile)

Ashley, Jordan and Kimball showed up at my door the other day with a delivery of comfort, love, sunshine, sympathy, and flowers! They sure know how to raise the spirits of a gal who has been a bit down in the mouth lately.

The problem, if you really want to know, is literally with my mouth. A root canal gone awry, in fact. Drama with a capital D-R-A-M-A. Pain, pain, pain. A brief run-down:

1 gigantuan tear-your-hair-out toothache

1 dentist in NYC on vacay

1 phone call to unknown dentist to just SHOOT ME DEAD(!), please

1/2 root canal performed by unknown dentist to alleviate pain, but not completed (fear of stepping on other dentist's toes?)

1/2 root canal completed by home-again dentist but sealing in bad germy dudes

1 iwannadierighthereandnow night

1 iwishicoulddierighthereandnow day

4,5,6, or more? phone calls made to:
dentist vacaying again--this time at Powell
retired dentist/neighbor
unknown dentist
family doc
local medieval barber for a bloodletting
anyone? anyone? Bueller? anyone?

1 trip to ER out of desperation

1 dose of very aggressive antibiotics through IV drip immediately administered

1 trip to ER next day; side note: H1N1 flu very popular with locals

1 dose of very aggressive antibiotics through IV drip (ER registration identical to first day; huh? computers don't store info? who knew?)

1 Sunday night visit to was-water-skiing-but-now-home-again dentist's office for aaaaacccckkkk drainage (UNBELIEVABLE pain, I cannot even begin to . . .)

1 love song composed as an ode to the miracle of Lortab

1 visit to dentist's office for more aaaaaaaccccckkkkk drainage with a rubber drain sutured in

1 visit to hospital to receive more IV antibiotics--watched Oprah (not on my fav list, hasn't been for a looooooonng time now)

1 visit to dentist's office to determine drain needs to remain in place (office in the middle of shooting a commercial . . . quiet on the set, please . . . and I'm not making this up)

1 visit to hospital to receive #4 IV antibiotics--watched Oprah again (that Judge Judy can be so grating, don't you think?)

1 visit to dentist's office; removal of drain after dentist searches, searches (yeow!) for suture knot

1 bottle of uber-robust oral antibiotics which make food taste like . . . ick . . . or is it the IV? Whatever. It's just . . . ick.

1 jaw looking more like a squirrel with a nut in its cheek than a puffer fish in full-bloat mode

1 case of rash/hives presumably from antibiotic

2 trips back to dentist for monitoring purposes (office staff still aghast at the sight)

1 thankful me who can cope with what might be up to a month of dealing with remaining knot of infection as well as complete numbness(!) of part of my chin but is relatively pain-free in comparison to recent days/nights

1 saga to be continued with future visits to dentist, but with (hopefully) the worst having had its ugly way with me

And . . .

1 partridge in a pear tree.

So where was I? Oh, yeah. Thank you so much Ashley, Jordan and Kimball. The flowers are exactly what my weary little soul needed. You are the bestest.

Look if you dare but use caution; small children should be escorted out of the room . . .

Count yourselves lucky that this picture was taken before my cheek
reached its pinnacle glory. My bishop was privy to that sight, however,
and I swear, he nearly fainted dead away. I could tell it took every ounce
of decorum he possessed to not run screaming like a little girl out of my house.


Lisa said...

No way! I am so sorry. I'm putting Doug on the next flight! Off topic: I think you might enjoy my sister's blog. It is very different from mine: hardly any photos and lots of creative writing. Here is the address: Check it out while you are recuperating.

Shane, Liz and all the Crew said...


I am so sorry you had to go through all that trauma! hope it is way behind you now!


Shane, Liz and all the Crew said...

PS. you are amazingly witty for a sick girl!

Beth said...

Oh my! What a terrible experience for you! I hope that those nasty bugs are drained for good!

Melissa said...

OH.MY.WORD! I cannot even explain how much pity I have for you right now. Between death and dentists, I usually opt for death. I hope you are on the mend very, VERY quickly.

Ashley said...

We're so glad you're on the mend!

The Morris Family said...

Oh my gosh! I heard that root canals are not a pleasant day at the beach, but this is taking it a bit too far don't you think! What were your teeth/gums thinking? I am SO sorry! Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. I will be in the car before you know it to help you with whatever needs to be done!

The Morris Family said...

Beautiful flowers by the way!