Grrrr . . . It's a Manly Man!

In the wake of Father's Day, I was reminded of a tiny little article I recently read in my local newspaper. (I swear, the two newspapers I take are literally shrinking every single day, yet they still have space for Brenda Starr and Judge Parker? Gotta wonder about those ink men.)

Where was I? Oh yeah. The article. It was entitled, "SLC ranks 16th on the 'Manliest Cities' list." Oh boy. I knew this would be good. According to the article, a study ranked cities on criteria such as the number of professional major league sports teams, popularity of tools and hardware (popularity of tools and hardware? could they mean, popularity of tools and hardware stores perhaps?), and . . . wait for it . . . frequency of monster truck rallies. My, my, my. A manly man's paradise if I ever saw one.

I'm just positive you are as eager as a beaver to see the entire list so here ya go:

1. Nashville, TN

2. Charlotte, NC

3. Oklahoma City, OK

4. Cincinnati, OH

5. Denver, CO

6. St. Louis, MO

7. Columbus, OH

8. Kansas City, MO

9. Indianapolis, IN

10. Toledo, OH

11. Memphis, TN

12. Richmond, VA

13. Columbia, SC

14. Orlando, FL

15. Dayton, OH

16. Salt Lake City, UT

Ohio wins hands down with four of the top 16 cities. I've got to be honest here, folks. In my book there is more to being a manly man than just needing a step stool to climb into his vehicle, as alluring as that may be. In my book a manly man:

*walks the floor with a crying baby at 3:00 a.m.

*works at a job he doesn't necessarily love but does so anyway to provide for his family

*speaks with care and doesn't take the tempting route of criticizing

*expresses pride in his boy even after his son makes the game-losing play

*plays dress-ups with his young daughter even as she insists he play the part of grandma

*does the dishes

*folds the laundry

*cleans the toilets(!)

*goes to a chick flick without noticeably wincing or groaning throughout

*tenderly reads that same princess story over and over, complete with voice inflections

*weeds the irises with great care

*fails to point out flaws of others, but rather, notices strengths and growth

*quietly leads with an example of complete integrity and honesty

Now that, my friends, is my kind of a "manly man." And I am so happy to say that I have more manly men in my life than I surely deserve.

So, now. I know this list is incomplete. What makes a man manly to you? I would love to read what your ideas of manly men are. Please share, k? And don't be shy about it, even if the first image that pops into your head is a man holding a plumber's helper. That's cool too.

Fridays With Kimball!

Christian, Kimball and I decided to go for a walk in a nearby park that has a small little pond at its center. By the by, have you ever noticed that fishermen are a truly dedicated bunch? I swear, that pond couldn't have been more than one hundred yards across and about six inches deep, but there were anglers a go-go trying to catch who knows what. And not little kids--these guys had their big muscle trucks and big muscle shirts and big muscle bobbers. Funny. Anywho! Kimball wasn't quite up to making the trek on his own two feet this time around, and since Christian (see pic below) has outgrown his old stroller (ya think?), he graciously offered Kimball the use of his throne-on-wheels where Kimball was able to wave to all of his minions who hold him in very high esteem indeed.

She Might As Well Take Advantage of the Family Discount Perk!

After Ashley saw Kimball in all of his glory where he was "Puttin' on the Ritz," she decided it was time to revisit her own piano skills and take a refresher course. (Ashley took lessons for almost ten years before she declared, "enough!" without my say-so, btw.) As you witnessed in the video from my previous post, Ashley obviously passed on her talent to her offspring. She is now the student once again.

In the photos below, we see Kimball teaching Ashley the finer points of being a concert pianist, chief among them: possessing nerves of steel, exhibiting a flamboyant personality and sporting a dry diaper. Kimball even demonstrated a technique not usually seen on the stages of the world's premier concert halls, a technique Kimball calls, "toeing."

I think Ashley got her money's worth out of her session; you should have seen her "toeing" by the end of her $150/half-hour lesson! Aw, what a shame that my camera batteries konked out at that exact moment. Wouldn't you just know it? :[

Fridays With Kimball!

Due to Kimball's early exposure to the fine arts, he has emerged as the world's latest child prodigy. Please turn off all cell phones, curtail the noise of cellophane candy wrappers, and enjoy the show!

Coming soon: The complete Kimball Kollection, Director's Cut Edition, containing never-before-seen footage! Place your order now--this offer is for a limited time only and is not available in stores.

Ick

I heard some disturbing news the other day: A live-action feature-length movie based on "The Jetsons" cartoon is due to start filming in November. For the love of Pete, leave George Jetson and Jane-his-wife as they are, k? We don't need another cartoon-to-live-action disaster like that trainwreck, "Speed Racer." Wish I had that bubble that encloses Jane and vamps her up in about one one-hundredth of a second. That would leave me so much more time for important chores like Internet shopping and stuff . . .

I'm Not a Traitor, But . . .

Thanks to Kat, Christian and I were weeping with laughter the other day while watching this video. I don't mean to

betray my own kind but, holy wrecks, this is funny!

Having a Wonderful Time . . .

I've got to hand it to Christian--he sure indulges me at the peril of enduring great embarrassment to himself. A big boatload of brownie points for Christian!

So Christian was messing around with the stop-action feature on our computer, and I persuaded cough,forced,cough him to make a kooky little featurette starring the two of us. Make sure you have the volume turned up as you play this, because that knocking sound that you hear at the 00.02 mark? That's the hollowness in my head, indisputable evidence that I should never, under any circumstances, be asked to balance a checkbook. Are you listening, Dave?

Thanks Christian! You are such a sport!

Fridays With Kimball!

"Little Sprite"

Check out this sleeping little "sprite."  (Ashley calls Kimball her little sprite on the days when this wee laddie be wearin' o' the green.) So Ash and I spied these adorable shorts at the store the other day, and, of course, I couldn't conquer my inner demon aka my shopping compulsion, and I had those shorts purchased before you could blink a shining Irish eye.  I love how the shorts are actually more like kicky little capri pants since Kimball isn't so long in the limbs quite yet :) 

Before Ashley left Kimball to head out for her day at the salt mines (thesis torture), she helped Kimball jot down a little birthday wish for Uncle Seanie on a big poster that I'm making for him.  Now I ask you, isn't my grandbaby a perfect candidate for Mensa?  Uh, yeah.

FTD Delivers Again!

FTD (From The Darndestgreenthumbever) comes this beautiful bouquet.  I stopped by Mom's house and offered a Krispy Kreme or two, and I came home with something that smells as good almost as good as Original Glazed, although not quite as tasty going down.   Thanks again, Mom!

Live Long and Prosper

The group, Without Arrogance & Categorically Kooky Every Day, has given the movie, "Star Trek," three and one-half  Roddenberrys for its excellence in casting, wit, special effects and retention of just enough campiness to satisfy the old-school trekkies everywhere.  Great summer flick.   Warp speed. 

Fridays With Kimball!

Um . . . I guess you could say that I have been having more than just a teensy bit of fun with Kimball during my "Fridays With Kimball!" days (and Tuesdays! too).   And bless Christian's heart for being my cohort and indulging me in my wild schemes and admittedly wacked-out ideas.  But you must agree, the following video is hijinks at its best. Please heed the warning message at the end of the video.  It may save a life.  (Make sure you watch to the very end.)

She Has Such a Green Thumb!

My mom can grow ANYTHING! She once tossed a seed from a lemon used in her dinner into a pot of dirt. Up came a lemon tree! Bam.  Just like that. Same thing with a regular old peach pit. Threw the pit into her yard, and now she has a ginormous peach tree. Same goes for her apricot tree. Crazy. The other day she told me she was going to try to grow some sweet potatoes. So she just whacked off the end of a sweet potato and plunked it into some dirt. No doubt, she'll be overrun with the things before the end of summer.

I visited her for a few minutes the other day and came home with this simple but beautiful display snipped from her yard. I could have gone crazy with all that she has growing, but I settled for minimal beauty this time around. I feel so pampered having my own personal florist who doesn't mark up her prices 400% (merely 200%).  jk, mom :)

The cloudy water in the vase is due to air bubbles from the tap, not from gross "ferrous and ferric iron compounds" from old rusty pipes . . . I'm  hoping . . .

Fridays With Kimball!

Christian dubbed Kimball "Little Johnny Appleseed" when somehow this measuring cup Kimball was playing with while lying on his blanket ended atop of his cute little head.   Kimball doesn't seem to mind his new name, or his new look.  Apparently, sporting plastic kitchen utensils is the hippest trend in the baby social set at the moment.  Quite dapper.

And speaking of dubbing, Dave has christened our little porta-crib-thingy-gig the "Kimball Coaster."  Dave tells me it is because he is quite certain Kimball goes for wild rides in the Coaster when our backs are turned.  I don't blame Kimball because, after all, the Coaster is tricked out with some pretty studly wheels and a nifty GPS system.  (GPS stands for Grandpa Pledges his Silence, just as long as Kimball keeps everything on the downlow and his mama doesn't get wind of any of this riotousness . . .

And the Beat Goes On . . .

Christian was given the honor of receiving one of three "Outstanding Percussion I" awards presented at the annual awards night at his high school.  That squealing and woo-hooing that was heard in the audience making Dave sink down into his seat?  Yes, that would be me.   I am so proud of that boy!

Hey Fellow AI Fans!

Kris? Seriously? KRIS? I'm just sayin'.

Fridays With Kimball!

This particular "Friday with Kimball" ended on a high note at TGIFridays!  How appropriate. Haven't been there for a couple of  years. 

 After being seated, Kimball contemplated his order and finally settled on the triple stacked burger, cooked rare with extra bacon, extra sharp cheddar and extra onions. But sadly, his mama said no. Hmmph! He sucked it up though and made do with the Similac Special. His tummy will thank his mama for being so wise. (Sometimes it is just so hard to make these tough decisions and stand up to the pressure in order to be a good parent. Way to go, Ash!)

AND NOW FOR THE REST OF THE STORY:  Only hours after returning home from our outing at TGIFridays, we tuned in to our most trusted and reliable source of unbiased news,  Late Show with David Letterman, where we learned that a man recently eating at a restaurant in upstate New York found a snake head in his broccoli.  The restaurant?  TGIFridays.  Of course. I'm sure you will be kind enough to excuse me now while I, uh, have a moment . . .  

A Future Project for Sean and Christian . . .

Probably because I am a bit (understatement alert!) lonely for Sean, and probably because I'm a bit lonesome for the sounds of Sean and Christian jamming in the studio downstairs causing the paint to peel off of the ceiling, and probably because I adore watching my boys collaberate on their music and take such joy in each other, this piece (see video below) totally spoke to me. I can't say I'm really a Taylor Swift fan, but I really like Cold Play. I always think of Seanie whenever I hear Viva La Vida because he loves it so. And the lyrics mention "missionaries in the foreign field . . . " so I'm sure you can guess that it rips at my heart with each listen of that song.

So, this video is pretty cool. I have very high hopes (meaning, they better do it if they know what's good for them) that Sean and Christian will tackle this when Sean returns from his two years of awesome service. What a sweet duo that will make, I'm quite certain. And I'm also quite certain it will make me cry. Please enjoy.

Thank you new-mommy-to-Cole-Kristen for passing this along.

Happy Mother's Day!

Fridays With Kimball!

Ring, ring. (Caller ID: "Out of area" no phone number)

"Mmmffgaaahhh?"

"Hello."

"Aaaaoooggff?"

"Hello!"

"Gaaa?"

"Hello. Do you know who you are talking to?" (Static, static)

"Muncle Hawnie?" SHREIK! "Gurglegaaahhhh!"

Kimball was thrilled beyond words that he was here when Uncle Seanie made his surprise phone call (see previous post) on a Kimball Friday!

Happy Early Mother's Day to Me!

Ring, ring. (Caller ID: "Out of area" no phone number)

"Hello?"

"Hello."

"Hello?"

"Hello. Do you know who you are talking to? (static, static)

"Uh, hello? No, who is this?"

"This is Elder Sagers."

SHREIK! "What? Uh, wha . . . Seanie? . . . SEANIE!!! SEANIE, I LOVE YOU!", gush, gush, etc., etc., hyperventilate, take a breath, SHREIK again . . . immediately think the worst, receive assurance that all is well, jump up and down, SEANIE!

Just a mission-approved pre-Mother's Day phone call from our awesome missionary making sure we had the correct phone number and time we are to call him on Sunday! Thank you Alexander Graham Bell.